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Creating Reality October 18, 2012

Posted by Living Abundance in Uncategorized.
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October 14th, 2012

Today is a Day of Mindfulness for me, my first real DOM in two weeks. I thought I would share one insight of many I have had lately. A worry that was bothering me recently was feelings of exclusion and alienation. (In part this may have been related to my difficulties at work that made me consider the possibility of leaving my area of work and training. In a sense, I eventually saw this represented a dying of my professional self, the loss of Andrea the researcher, and an alienation from that area of society. Feelings of exclusion also come up when I visit close family, when I see how some of my family belongs to a grouping of society I feel I can’t avoid and is a part of my self.)

I came to the realization that having a worry of, for instance, being excluded from an aspect of society, is created and fostered in the mind, and in turn further cemented there each time I return to that worry. Having a worry about one day in the future possibly being excluded is only an image, a mental construction. It can’t necessarily be completely true because the mind never has a complete vision of reality, able to see a situation from every perspective (to quote Gandalf from The Lord of the Rings, “Even the very wise cannot see all ends”). My fear is based on my past conditioning that I project onto the future.

Furthermore, when I worry about myself falling victim to a possible future scenario, that vision is also a limited mental construction. That is, my idea of myself is a mental construction. I never see my complete, true self from all possible perspectives. My idea of who I am is always incomplete and limited. Therefore, I have no absolute certainty that I will be a person who is susceptible to falling into a certain scenario. Maybe I have a hidden capacity within myself that will allow that never to happen. Further, I have an idea that a scenario will be “bad” and will cause me pain and suffering, but I have no way of knowing that this will be true. One piece of knowledge that gives me great hope are accounts of other people’s life situations that sound absolutely devastating and dreadful, yet these people can amazingly report still being content and free from deep suffering and anguish.

Finally, each time I bring up and dwell on a fear of something happening to me, I further make concrete both the scenario being possible and myself being susceptible to that and suffering as a result. Which in turn makes it more likely the worry and fear will arise again in the future, and then further making the constructions real in the mind. And so the wheel of samsara ever turns, over and over…

What if there is a different way of imagining what could happen? What if instead of dwelling on bad situations being likely to happen, I create and add mental energy to wholesome and beneficial ones? Not to say that the beneficial ones will happen with absolute certainty, but that I’m going to give food to an expectation that they could. Anything is possible. I’m placing my bets on a different set of cards. I’m changing my default views and operating set of assumptions of reality, the world, and how I fit into it. If I give energy and intention to what is good being possible, I know it is more likely that they will happen.

Ultimately, I know that both “good” and “bad” scenarios are illusions and mental constructions, and thus not entirely real. What is real is what is directly happening now, which is beyond concepts and mental constructions. But I know that how I view the world and reality can drastically change what does end up happening. Now the challenge is how to strengthen and foster this insight and let it spread into all aspects of how I view the world, how I interact with and respond to what’s happening. Or at least to spread it to as many aspects as possible.



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